Foster Parent Manual 14. The Court Process
1. Legal categories of children
1. 300. The Health and Welfare Code (Section 300) includes children who have
been neglected, abused and/or molested. If the situation is serious enough,
these children are made dependent children of the Juvenile Court and assigned
into the care, custody and control of Child Protective Services (typically a
division of county Welfare offices).
2. 601 and 602. The Health and Welfare Code section 601 refers to children who
have committed statutory crimes, such as curfew violations or are beyond the
control of parents. 601 children cannot be put in juvenile hall (jail) nor can
they be held for long periods of time in temporary custody. In many counties,
these children fall between the cracks and are ignored.
The 602 category includes all other misdemeanor and felony crimes. These
children are assigned a county probation officer by the juvenile court. Most 602
children live with their families, but some are made a ward of the court and
removed from their families, under the supervision of a probation officer.
2. Role of CPS
1. Investigation of Child Abuse Reports. CPS workers are responsible for
conducting child abuse investigations. Anyone can make a complaint or give
information to CPS which may trigger an investigation. While conducting an
investigation, CPS has tremendous authority. For example, they can demand to
enter a home and remove a child under emergency conditions. It is our role to
fully assist CPS, but not get in their way or undermine their efforts. Foster
parents must be careful not to "taint" information prior to CPS
conducting their investigation, with unnecessary inquiries. Whenever possible,
it is best for CPS to be the first person to question the child in depth about a
child abuse matter.
2. Hearings - Detention, Jurisdictional, Dispositional. During the course of
an investigation, a child may be removed from the parental home on an emergency
basis (detained). In order to approve the action, a detention hearing is held in
court within 48 hours (weekends excluded). If the temporary removal is approved
by the court, the next step is to have a jurisdictional hearing. This phase
determines if the court should take control of the child for a longer period of
time. The court would assume jurisdiction, making the child a dependent of the
court. The final step is to decide where the child should live and under what
conditions. This dispositional hearing can send the child home, while keeping
control, or can continue the out-of-home placement. Through all of these steps,
EA and foster parents have little to do, except provide CPS relevant information
about the child. The parents can contest all phases and are provided an
attorney, if unable to pay. In some situations, the child may be assigned an
independent attorney, but usually the 300 child is represented by the CPS
attorney.
3. Hierarchy of who to place with. The law directs the court to place the
child in the family home, if suitable. The next consideration is to relatives.
Finally, the child is placed in the "least restrictive environment"
suitable, including foster homes or group homes.
4. Reunification. After a child is made a 300 dependent, the first plan of
action is called reunification. This means that CPS develops a plan to reunify
the child to the family. The written plan imposes certain expectations on the
family and CPS is required to assist the family in various specific ways.
Generally EA does not receive a copy of the plan as it involves the parents
rather than the child. When the parents comply with the reunification plan, they
are entitled to regain custody of the child. It is important for foster parents
to understand, the decision is not based upon the child's "best
interest". Rather, it focuses on the performance of the parents. This means
that CPS and courts may be required to send children home when they really don't
want to.
At any time during the reunification period, if a relative is willing and
determined to be fit, the law directs that children will be given to them.
5. Six Month Review. The court can have a hearing any time during the
reunification phase, but typically reviews the case at 6 month intervals (the
longest interval permitted by law).
6. Permanency Planning. In as early as 1 year, but no longer than 18 months,
the reunification phase ends. The case moves into the next phase, permanency
planning. This mean that CPS must write a "permanent" plan, with the
alternatives of adoption, guardianship, or long term foster care. Attempts at
reunification are abandoned, but the natural parents are occasionally granted
visitation, particularly for teenagers. Adoption is the preferred goal, but may
not be suitable if the child is too old or not likely to be adopted. The second
choice is guardianship, and finally long-term foster care the last choice. If
the determination is continued foster care, the foster parent often has a
stronger right to keep the child than a newly discovered relative. If proof of a
bond can be established, foster parents are in an even stronger position than a
relative, if adoption is the alternative. The general rule for determining who
has custody changes from parental rights (reunification) to the "best
interests of the child" in permanency planning.
3. Role of Probation
1. Law Enforcement's role. Crimes are investigated in the normal way by law
enforcement. Most children undergo a trial and remain in the family home.
Sometimes, because of circumstances, children will be removed from their family
home and made a ward of the court under the supervision of a probation officer.
This is similar to being made a dependent child under CPS control.
2. Hearings - Detention, Jurisdictional, Dispositional. The same series of
hearings are conducted as with CPS children. The focus is different in that no
guilt or blame is assigned to parents. Issues involve where the child should be
placed in order to promote the goal of probation, reform or rehabilitation.
Parents have the ability to contest the planned placement, but are not provided
an attorney. The child is assigned an attorney, although parents can pay for
one. The district attorney prosecutes the case, with the probation department
assisting by providing information and suggestions to the court.
3. Conditions of Probation. Having been found guilty of a crime, the child is
often assigned a period of probation as part of the sentence. The child will be
given a list of "do's and don'ts" called Conditions of Probation.
These are rules which must be followed, or a revocation of probation can occur.
Revocation involves going back to court and fulfilling the penalties assigned
for the original crime (some of which probably were suspended). A child cannot
serve more jail time than assigned for the original offense, but the child may
be placed in secure camps or various group homes and foster homes in order to
manage his/her behavior.
4. Community Service - Restitution. Frequently, but not always, children are
sentenced to perform community service or pay back restitution for the crime.
Community service involves any work the probation officer decides is for the
public benefit. Foster parents may have responsibility in seeing to it that the
work is completed, but are not expected to force a child to comply. Similarly,
foster parents should assist the child in developing a plan to pay the
restitution, including helping the child find a job. Children will not be let
off probation until all community service and restitution is satisfied.
5. EA's role and relationship with CPS and Probation. Courts have ultimate
authority regarding our children. CPS and Probation act on behalf of the
juvenile court. They are in control and make the final decisions regarding our
children. Occasionally we differ from those agencies in our opinion of what
should happen to children. At those times, an EA social worker will be available
to assist foster parents in deciding what, if anything, might be done. Sometimes
it may be a matter of presenting written information to those agencies. It has
been our experience that those agencies give careful consideration to our
observations and suggestions. Most judges thoroughly read any correspondence we
send to the court.
Types of Children in Your Home. EA receives a wide range of children, but
they all have one thing in common; the parental home is not suitable for the
child at this time. Sometimes that is because of parental problems, other times
because the child is beyond the parent's ability to control.
1. Court Reports and Court Hearings. EA is required to periodically write a
status report on the child. The EA social worker will work with foster parents
in gathering information for those reports. Foster parents are entitled to see
the reports, as they may be helpful in continued work with the child. Foster
parents are entitled to be, and we want them to be, present at all court
hearings. An EA social worker should also be present to assist foster parents in
understanding the process. Sometimes, although rarely, foster parents are asked
questions by the judge during the hearing. The questions are usually simple to
answer and are not threatening issues for foster parents.
2. Judge and Attorney. Our experience is that judges are interested in the
welfare of children and read all information presented to them. Rarely do we
send information directly to the judge, but it gets there through CPS and
Probation. There may be several attorneys involved in cases. We have little
contact directly with attorneys, but can under certain circumstances. Again, we
tend to deal with CPS and Probation, who in turn deal with attorneys and judges.
3. Contact with child's authorized representative. Authorized representative
means the CPS worker or probation officer involved in the case. Generally we
prefer if the worker or officer contacts an EA social worker, rather than the
foster parent directly, but they are not required to follow that chain of
communication. When foster parents are contacted directly, all information
should be provided, without hesitance or reservation. EA keeps no secrets from
these agencies, so foster parents should not feel they are going behind EA's
back in providing information. As a courtesy, we want foster parents to promptly
share with us the same information provided to the child's authorized
representative. Make sure you know it is the authorized representative, though.
We don't want to give confidential information to someone other than the correct
person. So, if you don't recognize the authorized representative, ask for
identification. Feel free to call the CPS, Probation, or EA office to confirm
the correct identity. Rarely does someone (like a natural parent) misrepresent
themselves in order to obtain information, but it does happen.
15. Types of Abuse.
If a child is removed as a result of abuse, the abuse must have been quite
severe.
1. Physical Abuse. Justification for removal of a child from the parental home
involves more than mere spankings; the spankings probably left bruises. The CPS
worker must have felt that the situation could not be resolved by keeping the
child in the family home and monitoring the situation. So, the abuse was likely
to have been habitual, excessive, and likely to re-occur. There is a category of
"psychological abuse" but it is rarely used as justification of
removal. Yelling, belittling, and threatening are examples of psychological
abuse.
2. Sexual Abuse. While the majority of children sexually abused are females,
there is an increasing realization that boys are being sexually abused also.
Sometimes it is difficult to prove sexual abuse when the child is very young or
the child is uncooperative. However, this is not the problem of foster parents.
They are not investigators or expected to prove a case. They are expected to
monitor the child and report any unusual behaviors.
3. Neglect. Clearly, neglect comes in all sizes and forms. In order for a
child to be removed from the parental home, the neglect must be extreme and
endangering the child's welfare.
4. Drug Exposed. We receive a few young children as a result of parental drug
abuse during pregnancy.
16. Criminal activity by the child.
1. Drug/Alcohol Abuse. Drug and alcohol abuse are typical problems of
delinquent teenagers referred to EA by probation. The substance abuse may range
from light experimental to habitual. Whatever information we have about the
child's history will be given to foster parents.
2. Gang Behavior. We accept relatively few children into foster care who have
had extensive gang related affiliation. Foster parents and even our group homes
are not equipped to deal with serious gang members. We do take "wanna
be" gang members and fringe members. In this case, we feel strongly that
everything should be done to distance the child from gang involvement. This
includes not wearing gang "colors" or certain clothes signifying
membership. Foster parents must be watchful for these signals and understand
that the clothes and trinkets signaling membership change from time to time. If
the child wears one set of clothes out the door and changes to another set at
school, be suspicious. Foster parents have the right to prevent children from
wearing certain clothes. Any clothes confiscated as being unacceptable must be
turned over to CPS or probation. Foster parents have the authority to determine
which clothes the child may wear and may search clothing or possessions at any
time. If you contemplate a search, it is a good idea to check with your EA
social worker about this before it is done. It is usually better if someone else
does the search or "orders" the search. We want foster parents to be
parents, not law enforcement personnel.
3. Violations of the law. Criminal activity by the child must be reported. We
prefer to be notified prior to law enforcement whenever possible. Usually we can
direct the notification to the proper person. Additionally, we must report all
unusual incidents to Community Care Licensing, including those described below.
4. Self-Mutilation/Suicide (attempt). As with any unusual behavior, a child
engaging in these hurtful behaviors requires an immediate response. EA and the
child's authorized representative need to know the situation and formulate plans
on what to do about it. Trained professionals will usually be consulted about
the seriousness and treatment plan.
5. Out-of-Control. There are times when the child may be momentarily out of
control. This behavior can usually be managed, with the foster parent consulting
the EA social worker about different methods of defusing the situation. However,
when the child remains out of control and presents a danger to himself/herself
or to others, an EA social worker must be notified promptly. Sometimes the
behavior is so serious that the first phone call should be made to the sheriff.
Foster parents must use their best judgment.
On rare situations when the child is doing harm to himself/herself or is
damaging your property you may restrain the child. The procedure is discussed
later in the section on Discipline/Restraint.
1. Run-aways. Essentially, this is similar to a child being out-of-control.
Call an EA social worker promptly. You should make an effort to locate the
child, especially for younger children. You may take whatever action is
necessary to prevent harm to the child or others, but your actions must not be
excessive and should stop whenever the danger is over. An example of harm is
when a six year old is walking down the middle of the street. But mere
protection, such as stopping a 16 year old from running into the woods, is not
sufficient justification for you to use force.
2. Truant. The family should be prepared for instances of truancy. A plan of
action, involving a consequence should be ready. Discuss the plan with an EA
social worker.
3. Unacceptable behavior. This includes a whole shoe box of behavior that is
not civilized and tolerable under normal conditions. Foster parents should have
various consequences and rules to deal with unacceptable behavior. The standard
for unacceptable is whatever the family decides is not acceptable. This may vary
from family to family, but will generally be similar.
17. Behaviors to Expect.
Most children we receive seem relatively "normal"; others have a
variety of psychological, developmental, educational, and physical problems that
are readily apparent.
1. Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD). Some cynics might say that
the nature of children is to be non-attentive. But some children, because of
some unknown biological, chemical, or genetic reason, are much more inattentive
than others. Some of the children are unable to be "normally"
attentive, no matter how hard they try. Such children have an attention deficit
disorder (ADD). It's difficult for the average foster parent to know the
difference between an ADD child and a precocious or normally active child.
Foster parents should seek help from an EA social worker to assist in
determining if the child has a genuine attention deficit. Some children who have
attention deficits have an additional handicap, hyperactivity. This refers to
behavior that is beyond the normal level of activity. Again, the cause is a
still unknown biological, chemical, or genetic problem. Some forms of ADD and
ADHD are treatable with prescription medications such as Ritalin or Cylert. If
you have questions about this problem or medications, consult an EA social
worker. EA has several video tapes about ADD and ADHD available for viewing by
foster parents and agencies.
2. Antisocial - Stealing, lying, defiance. Most children referred to foster
family agencies have at least one of these problems. They do not trust adults
and usually have excellent reasons not to trust authority figures. Consequently,
trying to emphasize the idea of trust early in placement is not a good idea. The
process of teaching trust begins with having the child trust that you will do
what you say. The child learns to trust your actions, then will imitate your
consistency. Setting up situations which test the child's trustworthiness and
honesty is a prescription for failure. Assume these qualities are skills which
need to be developed over several years.
3. Sexual Acting Out.
1. Molestation. Many of our children have been molested. Statistics show that
molested children are more likely to molest others and act promiscuously. Signs
of molest in very young children include touching self in sexual places,
inserting objects in anal and vaginal orifices, engaging in sex play with
others, bullying, extreme shyness, and fear of strangers. The presence of some
of these signs does not automatically confirm molest. Discuss any of these or
other unusual behaviors with a social worker. Older children may develop
preoccupations with sex, promiscuity, and using objects for sexual
gratification.
Generally we need to stop the unacceptable behavior, without making the
situation excessively punishing. The more punishment and disapproval shown, the
more likely the child will withdraw and continue the practice in increasingly
worse ways. One of the best plans to curtail unacceptable sexual behavior is to
have repeated open discussions about it.
2. Mutual Consent. Many of our teenagers are sexually active. EA is not in
favor of permitting sex between teenagers. On the other hand, we do not want
foster parents to be jailers. This will be a matter to discuss with an EA social
worker if it becomes a problem.
3. Pregnancy. A pregnancy during foster care is unacceptable. If there is a
risk of pregnancy, the alternatives are for the teen to voluntarily use birth
control or for the foster parent to insure that the teenager is continuously
monitored. Foster parents can require teens to take birth control pills in front
of them as proof of protection. A child may refuse, in which case continuous
supervision and monitoring is required. Monitoring is difficult when the chid
goes to school. If this is a problem, discuss the matter with your social
worker.
EA accepts already pregnant teens and teen mothers. Foster parents are free
to take or reject those arrangements, including having the infant and teen
mother together.
4. Sexually transmitted disease. A medical evaluation should occur within the
first month of placement. Screening should be done by the physician for sexually
transmitted diseases and treatment provided. All ordinary procedures shall be
followed, including compliance with public health on contagious diseases.
AIDS is a special and confusing case. EA policy is to inform foster parents
promptly if we know that a child is HIV+ or has AIDS. Unfortunately, there may
be times when neither EA nor the referring agency will know about it. We believe
these occasions are rare. We have had very few children with the disease. If a
child is suspected of having the disease, tests can be ordered. Tests require
county approval and possibly a court order. While it is likely that we will be
informed of the results, because of peculiar laws, we may not be. So far, that
bizarre situation has not occurred. Foster parent wishes will be observed as it
relates to this disease.
5. Homosexuality. While a small number of our children are homosexual, it is
not unusual for children to sometimes engage in homosexual behavior of varying
degrees. A surprising number of "normal" children have had homosexual
contacts of one kind or another. If this situation occurs it is best to discuss
the alternatives with an EA social worker. Usually the referring county will be
involved in adopting plans relating to homosexual behavior with their wards or
dependent children.
4. Difficulties in school - learning and behavior. Many of our children have
special education needs. If such a problem is suspected, schools are responsible
for conducting an evaluation when notified by foster parents or EA. This process
is lengthy and includes educational testing. The results are presented by a team
of school professionals to us with a determination as to whether or not the
child is eligible for special education assistance. If that is the case, an
Individualized Education Plan (I.E.P.) is adopted. EA social workers are
expected to accompanying foster parents to IEP meetings.
Many of our children have behavioral problems requiring school discipline.
Generally, foster parents should treat these situations as they would if they
were the actual parent. There are times when an EA social worker should be
involved in the process.
Foster parents may disclose confidential information about the child to
school authorities if it is in the best interest of the child. However, most
information should be withheld as it does not affect the school or education of
the child. It's at our option whether or not to disclose the information. We
have found most school personnel sympathetic to our children when they know the
child's background.
Occasionally schools will believe a child's story, without checking the facts
with foster parents, or will champion the child's cause. At such times, expect
the school to contact EA or the county agency. Don't be overly upset at what may
appear to be an "end run" around your authority. We expect foster
parents to meet and maintain a dialogue with teachers. That often reduces
conflict and insures our children receive good care.
5. Problems with peers. Foster parents can accept or reject the child's choice
of friends. EA does not want our children keeping company with other children
who are a bad influence. Always screen prospective friends to insure yourself
that the situation is acceptable. Never permit your foster child to visit
another home, without being sure an acceptable adult is supervising the
situation. Don't take the child's word that an adult is present. Talk directly
with the adult to verify all arrangements. It is not merely a good idea to
"check up" on your foster child, it is required and a necessity. A
county may require a change of placement if the child were to visit an
unsupervised home and the foster parent took the child's word that supervision
was present.
18. Discipline/Restraint.
1. Discipline vs. Punishment.
Personal Rights. A list of child's rights are written and provided to the
child. Foster parents should read and follow the practices proscribed by law.
For example, never prevent children from calling law enforcement or their county
case worker. They can also call their parents, except when the county worker
orders otherwise. Foster parents are expected to pay for some phone calls, but
are not obligated to pay for all long distance calls.
Make sure you monitor your phone calls. Occasionally foster children have run
up a sizable phone bill for which the foster parent was entirely responsible. If
a call's charge is being reversed, watch that it is being done; then leave the
child to privacy.
2. No Withholding Family Visits. Generally, a schedule of natural parent
visits will be set by the county worker. EA policy is to avoid having those
visits occur in the foster parent's home. If this is a problem, talk with an EA
social worker. Foster parents are obligated to facilitate home visits, including
usually taking the child to the exchange site.
Never criticize the child's natural parents to the child. This practice can
result in a natural parent requesting a change of placement, and getting it
granted. Feel free to criticize natural parents with your EA social worker. But
remember, most times, children go home to the family. Your job is to help
children make the transition and promote reunification efforts.
3. Anger/Assaultive Behavior. Helping a child to express anger is useful, but
allowing a child to spew anger in unacceptable ways is not tolerable. Provide
consequences, including being sent to the bedroom if ugly anger cannot be
stopped immediately. You may stop a child from hitting you, but you are not
permitted to strike back.
4. Sexual Issues. Never leave a female child with a male babysitter other than
the foster father. Foster parents should be aware that many of our children have
been taught to relate to adults sexually. It may be difficult for children to
adjust to receiving attention and affection, but not sex. Foster fathers need to
be particularly careful in their contact with girls. Fathers may want to reserve
attention giving, affection, and hugs to when foster mothers are present.
5. Positive Statements/Reinforcement. Generally the children we receive have
experienced considerable punishment, correction, and discipline. What they are
lacking is praise, reward, and recognition. The single most important factor in
the foster parenting process is to establish a bond with the child. This is
easier if you concentrate on praising and rewarding the child. It is difficult
to imagine giving the child too much praise and recognition. You need to make up
for a whole history of neglect and abuse. Use non-sexual physical contact
freely, as well as surprise rewards. Create an atmosphere of the child
anticipating positive events occurring. It's not the dollar value of the gift or
treat, but the frequency and consistency that establishes the pattern. Even in
the middle of punishment, it is not difficult to remind the child how well
he/she does at something.
6. Rewards. Whatever objects you give the child as a reward becomes the
child's property. It is a good idea to make rewards smaller, so that they can be
given out more frequently. If you make the task too complex or advanced before a
reward is earned, the child will most likely fail. These children are not in the
habit of striving for success; they understand repeated failures. Many of them
have a history of striving for success, only to receive rejection as a reward.
So the stick-with-it pattern must be developed in small steps.
7. Make consequence fit the offense. It is best to make the consequences
immediate and as mild as will accomplish the task. Rely on repetition rather
than intensity to do the teaching. Generally, when placing a consequence upon a
behavior, make it as relevant to the misdeed as possible. For instance, if a
child was 15 minutes late arriving home, make them come home 15 (or 30) minutes
earlier the next time. If a child spent the night at a friend's house and
"got in trouble" while there, forbid them from spending the night at
that friends house again. The closer the child can relate the consequence to the
misdeed, the easier it will be for them to learn by it.
8. Restrictions/Time Outs. Being sent to the child's room or in a corner may
be acceptable, as long as the duration is reasonable. Exclusions of longer than
a half hour for the first offense, or two hours for subsequent offenses are
usually too long. Many children are ready to be good after 10-15 minutes of
exclusion. It is better to give six 10-minute exclusions than a one hour
exclusion. Even during exclusions, a child may contact law enforcement or the
county worker. Avoid pushing the child to their room or physically baring the
door to their room. This is seen as unacceptable by CCL, unless the child is
actually hurting themselves or others.
9. Restraints. Physically restricting a child is called a
"restraint" by the State. The definition is quite broad and includes
such things as blocking a child's path, pushing a child into a bedroom for
punishment, and holding a child's hand so they listen to a lecture when the
child is trying to walk away. Regulations only allow restraints to be used under
very restricted circumstances. The permitted situations are when a child is
hurting themselves, others or doing property damage. Restraints cannot be used
when there is only the suspicion that harm or damage could occur. It must be
reserved for when there is good cause to believe that without restraint, the
child will immediately do harm or damage.
Application of restraints is strictly governed and includes only the
application of the least restrictive measure to stop the harm or damage from
occurring. The restraint must also be stopped immediately when the danger has
passed.
Clearly, the issue involve parental judgment. We urge parents to avoid,
whenever possible, use of restraints. If nothing else, it saves on paperwork.
In general, the State believes that if the only way a foster parent can
maintain control is periodic use of restraints, that child is inappropriately
placed. The child should be placed in a higher level of care. There are some
exceptions, but they must be discussed with all parties and approved in advance
by Community Care Licensing.
10. Unacceptable Punishment. Many forms of punishment are acceptable. But some
forms of punishment even good natural parents use, are unacceptable under foster
care regulations. The State is willing to make the error of eliminating certain
types of punishment, even though effective, rather than have a few foster
parents abuse the method. For example, spankings are not allowed. A very small
number of foster parents went too far with spankings. So, no foster family can
spank. Perhaps that is unfortunate, but there are many other usable types of
discipline available. Most of our children are accustomed to overly harsh
punishment. Relying on harsh physical measures may not be the best way to rescue
these children. Maybe we should try to be as different as possible from the
harsh natural parents these children were removed from, even if that means
abandoning some discipline methods that you may have successfully used with your
own natural children.
Examples of unacceptable discipline include: prolonged periods of isolation;
standing too long facing a corner; bending over and holding one's ankles;
shaking the child; forcing the child to stay in one place for prolonged periods
of time; a single swat on the bottom; making the child wear certain clothes
designed as a punishment; ridicule; name calling; criticizing the child's
family; and doing excessive work.
If you're in doubt about a form of discipline, don't use it until you discuss
it with your social worker. We say this because if you do something the State
believes is unacceptable, we are required to submit a formal "Incident
Report" to the State about the situation. We don't want to report our
foster parents and you don't want a negative report filed on you. None of us
likes black marks against us, even if it's relatively mild.
We believe that punishment for foster children should be used only to change
future behavior. Generally, our children have received an overdose of
punishment. What they need is positives, not more negatives. Sure they need
correction, but less harshly than they already received from their natural
parents. We strongly believe a child will progress, less because of your
discipline, but more because of your love, commitment, and praise. We want you
to have firm rules and high standards, yet without a positive emotional bond,
foster children will view your home as a jail. Remember, foster children are not
like your own children; they don't start off with an underlying love for you.
It's the love and devotion that allows your rules and discipline to work, not
the punishment by itself. If punishment worked by itself, no one would return to
jail or prison. We want you to focus more on building the bond between you, than
being a disciplinarian.
11. What to do when nothing else works. There will be times, hopefully not
often, when you have tried all the above (and then some) and the child is still
out of control or the situation is only deteriorating further. It is at these
times when calling your EA social worker or another foster parent can help
tremendously. Often, brainstorming about ideas or just having another adult to
talk to will give you a new perspective.
While we don't want foster parents to give up prematurely, we do want to be
sensitive to the need for a placement change. Sometimes we're not successful, no
matter what we do. Fortunately, EA's experience is that foster parents often
make incredible changes in children.
19. Foster Family Rules.
1. Equal treatment or children. It is difficult for you to treat foster
children exactly as you would treat natural children. However, if you go on a
vacation, taking only your natural children, this gives foster children a
powerful message. We don't expect treatment to be exactly equal, but close.
2. Limitations of regulations. Some practices may be okay with your own kids,
but are unallowed with foster kids. Examples of differences given earlier
include: spanking and leaving children home unattended. Despite the few
differences, generally the rules and practices we expect you to maintain are the
same as for your natural children.
3. Know your rules ahead of time. You may want to write and post house rules
and chores. Foster children, like all children, try to use the excuse of
forgetting as a valid excuse for neglect. Limit the excuses of forgetting or
"I didn't know" by making rules and chores clear and consistent.
4. Choose your battles carefully; don't try to fix it all at once. Foster
children usually have multiple problems and deficiencies. Don't try to tackle
too many of the problems at once; that's a plan for failure. Prioritize the
goals, tackling the most easy to change behaviors first. Don't try to attack the
major issues first; they are typically the most difficult to change. Besides, it
is best to start a chain of successes rather than start with a high stakes
challenge. If you have to take a stand, which you probably will some time or
other, take it on a small, easily defensible matter, such as washing the dishes
or hanging up clothes. Avoid having the first battle be over a boyfriend,
girlfriend, or school grades.
5. How to make rules. Rules should be clear, concise, and usually written. You
should easily and comfortably be able to check on compliance every time. Make
the rule so it can be done at least five days a week, but preferably seven.
Avoid chore sharing or rotation as it complicates the process. Make the chore
something for the family, rather than keeping the child's room clean. Never
remind the child in advance or give warnings during the process. Establish in
advance a consequence that you can follow through with every time. If you are
consistent, the child will learn to trust; if you offer spotty enforcement, the
child will distrust you and test out the rules more.
20. Life in a Fishbowl; Loss of Privacy.
There is no question that being a foster parent involves some loss of
privacy. Your home become a "facility" open to EA and licensing
inspection at any time. You are expected to set standards at least at, but
usually above, the community norm. Some people may think you are reaping big
dollars at the expense of innocent children and may gossip behind your back.
Professionals will critically scrutinize the care you provide and the judgements
you make. Sometimes people who should be thanking you for caring for children,
are suspicious of your motives and distrust your observations. And perhaps as
you attend training sessions, you will learn of new "terrors"
inflicted upon foster parents.
Having described those horrors, EA recognizes that foster parents are the
most important ingredient in residential care. If a child gets better, it's not
by magic, it's by the care and devotion of foster parents. However, other
agencies view children as a pie, where foster parents are only one slice of the
whole. Legally that is true. Foster parents are entitled to voice their opinion,
but their opinion may not be followed.
Eventually EA hopes people will abandon the pie analogy and see the matter
our way. That is, as a multi-stranded necklace, with the child being the pendant
gemstone at the bottom. The foster parent is the central ring or link, between
the strands and the precious stone. Each strand of the necklace adds to the
support, richness, and beauty of the whole. But all strands are joined at the
foster parent link. Foster parents make the final and most important connection
with children. Each strand needs to help in the process rather than trying to
attach directly to the child. Besides merely being a pretty analogy, we believe
our view is more consistent with the good social work practices and practical
application of Systems Theory as taught in most university social work training
centers.
21. Confidentiality.
Unlike adults, children, except under certain special circumstances, do not
have a right to confidentiality. That means anything a child tells you must be
released to the child's authorized representative and EA if asked. Typically,
counties, courts, and EA are not concerned with little confidences, but will be
if the issue is important to the case. In the same manner, you are entitled to
all confidential information relevant to the child.
When releasing confidential information to EA, the county, or law
enforcement, make sure you know the person's identify. If you don't already know
the county worker, request their ID or making a phone call to confirm their
identity.
You may, but are not required to, release confidential, sensitive information
to schools and physicians. You may release information to those people if it is
in the child's best interest, but be selective. If in doubt, consult an EA
social worker. You may not release information to the natural parents, unless
directed to by EA or the county. You must not release sensitive information to
neighbors and friends about the child and child's family. Those people may know
the child is a foster child, but should not know, for example, that the child
was molested by the natural father. We have experienced rare situations where a
neighbor was told too much information and subsequently disclosed the
information inappropriately. Unfortunately, CPS agencies sometimes focus on
those rare instances and want to withhold relevant information to foster
families.
22. Burnout.
The capacity for doing foster care varies widely. Some people have been
foster parents for decades, making it a way of life. Other people have their
fill in short order. EA wants to promote foster care and tries to keep foster
parents fit. We do this by being available to you 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
Fortunately, few foster parents call us on the 24th hour of the 7th day. We hope
our weekly home visits serve to prevent emergencies. Part of the visit is to
help you deal with the child, but another part is to provide someone to talk
with about the demands of foster parenthood. Most foster parents enjoy having
someone to talk to about the child, even if sometimes it is only voicing
frustrations.
Sometimes situations become so difficult that a brief respite from each other
is needed. On these rare occasions, other foster parents have been good about
offering respite care when asked by EA social workers. The foster parent
providing respite is reimbursed the days of care with the foster child by the
foster parent of the foster child. The reimbursement is calculated according to
the monthly reimbursement. Your EA social worker can assist in this calculation.
Often, foster parents will make their own arrangements between themselves, just
be sure an EA social worker is notified and the financial end of things is
agreed upon.
One of the best ways to prevent burnout is to have realistic expectations for
the child and for yourself. Although we want the best for children, sometimes
they cannot meet a certain standard of performance. Other times, they are
mysteriously attracted to failure. The fact is, foster parents can't make
everything better, no matter how hard they try. Sometimes children or the court
make bad decisions. Sometimes it seems that all the good work you put in goes up
in smoke and you're not even left with gratitude.
If foster parents have realistic expectations, they are more likely to
withstand the rough times. They are important advocates for the child. The good
work they do does not vanish, but may submerge below the surface for some time.
It always remains available to the child. Often we have children return as
adults with heart warming stories of their foster care experiences and the
lessons learned. What prevents burnout is the belief that what you do matters,
and it really does matter. It matters regardless of what the court does or what
people say. If you have done a good job, that part remains forever available,
ready to nourish the child's future.
23. Working with EA social workers.
Social workers should assume the role of consultant and helper to you, more
than supervisor or evaluator. Understandably, social workers may take on a more
authoritarian role, but hopefully only briefly and rarely. They have an
obligation to make sure that your house and child care practices meet licensing
and EA standards. Beyond that, there is considerable room for individuality and
family variation.
There is a tendency for foster parents to sometimes treat EA social workers
as though they are outsiders, critical and expecting perfection. That leads to
omissions and cover ups. Our experience is that foster parents (and even EA
social workers) make mistakes. Most people in human services are willing to
forgive small errors, particularly as long as the mistake is promptly shared and
corrected. People are not inclined to forgive deception or dishonesty.
Our job is to help you rectify any situation so it doesn't grow into
something beyond our control. Treat EA social workers as being part of your
team, your extended family. We have a major stake in your success. We want you
to look good, because that's what makes EA look good. So, don't feel alone, we
are there to help you in your successes and failures.
24. EA Training Policy.
Current law requires all certified foster family homes to complete at least
12 hours of training prior to annual recertification. In a dual-parent home,
this means a combined total of 12 hours, in any combination, between foster
mother and foster father. For a single parent home, all 12 hours must be
obtained by the one foster parent.
Within 6 months of initial certification, at least one hour of training must
be dedicated to Child Abuse Reporting Laws. Acceptable training to meet the
required hours can be from EA sponsored training or training sponsored by other
agencies, such as Child Abuse Prevention Councils, Child Care Resource and
Referral, Probation or Social Services Departments, local PTAs, Red Cross, local
hospitals, and local Community Colleges. The first aid, CPR, and water safety
courses all apply to yearly training hours. EA staff will alert foster homes to
local training courses whenever possible.
A portion of the mandatory 12 hours/year can be obtained through self-study
with appropriate follow-up by a social worker. For example, an approved video
may be viewed in the foster home with a written test administered and reviewed
by an EA social worker. Finally, a discussion of key topics would complete the
training. Thus, watching a one hour approved video, along with write-up and
Social Worker review, would equal 11/2 hours of training. Similarly, an approved
book could be read, a report written and reviewed by a social worker, then a
follow-up discussion once again. For books, 200 pages will be considered one
hour.
At the expiration of the certificate, if the home does not have the necessary
training hours, the reimbursement rate will be reduced by $200 per month, per
child placed in the home, until such time as the home is current on training
hours. This policy also applies should the home not fulfill other certification
requirements such as updated DMV, current driver's license, and home-inspection
deficiencies at the time of re-certification. As soon as the home is current,
withheld money will be returned to the certified foster home. No new children
will be placed in the home unless the family is meeting the training standards.
If a foster home is still deficient at the end of a second year, the home will
be de-certified and the children will be removed. At that point, withheld money
will not be returned.
It is the intent of this agency to make training as convenient as possible.
Ultimately, however, EA will have no alternative but to comply with State law.
If there are any questions regarding this training policy, please contact any
of EA's directors: Tim Wilkinson (916)343-1100, Jim Hardee (916)283-3330 or
Roddy Mac (916)281-6666.
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