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Foster Parent Manual
Part II

14. The Court Process

1. Legal categories of children

1. 300. The Health and Welfare Code (Section 300) includes children who have been neglected, abused and/or molested. If the situation is serious enough, these children are made dependent children of the Juvenile Court and assigned into the care, custody and control of Child Protective Services (typically a division of county Welfare offices).

2. 601 and 602. The Health and Welfare Code section 601 refers to children who have committed statutory crimes, such as curfew violations or are beyond the control of parents. 601 children cannot be put in juvenile hall (jail) nor can they be held for long periods of time in temporary custody. In many counties, these children fall between the cracks and are ignored.

The 602 category includes all other misdemeanor and felony crimes. These children are assigned a county probation officer by the juvenile court. Most 602 children live with their families, but some are made a ward of the court and removed from their families, under the supervision of a probation officer.

2. Role of CPS

1. Investigation of Child Abuse Reports. CPS workers are responsible for conducting child abuse investigations. Anyone can make a complaint or give information to CPS which may trigger an investigation. While conducting an investigation, CPS has tremendous authority. For example, they can demand to enter a home and remove a child under emergency conditions. It is our role to fully assist CPS, but not get in their way or undermine their efforts. Foster parents must be careful not to "taint" information prior to CPS conducting their investigation, with unnecessary inquiries. Whenever possible, it is best for CPS to be the first person to question the child in depth about a child abuse matter.

2. Hearings - Detention, Jurisdictional, Dispositional. During the course of an investigation, a child may be removed from the parental home on an emergency basis (detained). In order to approve the action, a detention hearing is held in court within 48 hours (weekends excluded). If the temporary removal is approved by the court, the next step is to have a jurisdictional hearing. This phase determines if the court should take control of the child for a longer period of time. The court would assume jurisdiction, making the child a dependent of the court. The final step is to decide where the child should live and under what conditions. This dispositional hearing can send the child home, while keeping control, or can continue the out-of-home placement. Through all of these steps, EA and foster parents have little to do, except provide CPS relevant information about the child. The parents can contest all phases and are provided an attorney, if unable to pay. In some situations, the child may be assigned an independent attorney, but usually the 300 child is represented by the CPS attorney.

3. Hierarchy of who to place with. The law directs the court to place the child in the family home, if suitable. The next consideration is to relatives. Finally, the child is placed in the "least restrictive environment" suitable, including foster homes or group homes.

4. Reunification. After a child is made a 300 dependent, the first plan of action is called reunification. This means that CPS develops a plan to reunify the child to the family. The written plan imposes certain expectations on the family and CPS is required to assist the family in various specific ways.

Generally EA does not receive a copy of the plan as it involves the parents rather than the child. When the parents comply with the reunification plan, they are entitled to regain custody of the child. It is important for foster parents to understand, the decision is not based upon the child's "best interest". Rather, it focuses on the performance of the parents. This means that CPS and courts may be required to send children home when they really don't want to.

At any time during the reunification period, if a relative is willing and determined to be fit, the law directs that children will be given to them.

5. Six Month Review. The court can have a hearing any time during the reunification phase, but typically reviews the case at 6 month intervals (the longest interval permitted by law).

6. Permanency Planning. In as early as 1 year, but no longer than 18 months, the reunification phase ends. The case moves into the next phase, permanency planning. This mean that CPS must write a "permanent" plan, with the alternatives of adoption, guardianship, or long term foster care. Attempts at reunification are abandoned, but the natural parents are occasionally granted visitation, particularly for teenagers. Adoption is the preferred goal, but may not be suitable if the child is too old or not likely to be adopted. The second choice is guardianship, and finally long-term foster care the last choice. If the determination is continued foster care, the foster parent often has a stronger right to keep the child than a newly discovered relative. If proof of a bond can be established, foster parents are in an even stronger position than a relative, if adoption is the alternative. The general rule for determining who has custody changes from parental rights (reunification) to the "best interests of the child" in permanency planning.

3. Role of Probation

1. Law Enforcement's role. Crimes are investigated in the normal way by law enforcement. Most children undergo a trial and remain in the family home. Sometimes, because of circumstances, children will be removed from their family home and made a ward of the court under the supervision of a probation officer. This is similar to being made a dependent child under CPS control.

2. Hearings - Detention, Jurisdictional, Dispositional. The same series of hearings are conducted as with CPS children. The focus is different in that no guilt or blame is assigned to parents. Issues involve where the child should be placed in order to promote the goal of probation, reform or rehabilitation. Parents have the ability to contest the planned placement, but are not provided an attorney. The child is assigned an attorney, although parents can pay for one. The district attorney prosecutes the case, with the probation department assisting by providing information and suggestions to the court.

3. Conditions of Probation. Having been found guilty of a crime, the child is often assigned a period of probation as part of the sentence. The child will be given a list of "do's and don'ts" called Conditions of Probation. These are rules which must be followed, or a revocation of probation can occur. Revocation involves going back to court and fulfilling the penalties assigned for the original crime (some of which probably were suspended). A child cannot serve more jail time than assigned for the original offense, but the child may be placed in secure camps or various group homes and foster homes in order to manage his/her behavior.

4. Community Service - Restitution. Frequently, but not always, children are sentenced to perform community service or pay back restitution for the crime. Community service involves any work the probation officer decides is for the public benefit. Foster parents may have responsibility in seeing to it that the work is completed, but are not expected to force a child to comply. Similarly, foster parents should assist the child in developing a plan to pay the restitution, including helping the child find a job. Children will not be let off probation until all community service and restitution is satisfied.

5. EA's role and relationship with CPS and Probation. Courts have ultimate authority regarding our children. CPS and Probation act on behalf of the juvenile court. They are in control and make the final decisions regarding our children. Occasionally we differ from those agencies in our opinion of what should happen to children. At those times, an EA social worker will be available to assist foster parents in deciding what, if anything, might be done. Sometimes it may be a matter of presenting written information to those agencies. It has been our experience that those agencies give careful consideration to our observations and suggestions. Most judges thoroughly read any correspondence we send to the court.

Types of Children in Your Home. EA receives a wide range of children, but they all have one thing in common; the parental home is not suitable for the child at this time. Sometimes that is because of parental problems, other times because the child is beyond the parent's ability to control.

1. Court Reports and Court Hearings. EA is required to periodically write a status report on the child. The EA social worker will work with foster parents in gathering information for those reports. Foster parents are entitled to see the reports, as they may be helpful in continued work with the child. Foster parents are entitled to be, and we want them to be, present at all court hearings. An EA social worker should also be present to assist foster parents in understanding the process. Sometimes, although rarely, foster parents are asked questions by the judge during the hearing. The questions are usually simple to answer and are not threatening issues for foster parents.

2. Judge and Attorney. Our experience is that judges are interested in the welfare of children and read all information presented to them. Rarely do we send information directly to the judge, but it gets there through CPS and Probation. There may be several attorneys involved in cases. We have little contact directly with attorneys, but can under certain circumstances. Again, we tend to deal with CPS and Probation, who in turn deal with attorneys and judges.

3. Contact with child's authorized representative. Authorized representative means the CPS worker or probation officer involved in the case. Generally we prefer if the worker or officer contacts an EA social worker, rather than the foster parent directly, but they are not required to follow that chain of communication. When foster parents are contacted directly, all information should be provided, without hesitance or reservation. EA keeps no secrets from these agencies, so foster parents should not feel they are going behind EA's back in providing information. As a courtesy, we want foster parents to promptly share with us the same information provided to the child's authorized representative. Make sure you know it is the authorized representative, though. We don't want to give confidential information to someone other than the correct person. So, if you don't recognize the authorized representative, ask for identification. Feel free to call the CPS, Probation, or EA office to confirm the correct identity. Rarely does someone (like a natural parent) misrepresent themselves in order to obtain information, but it does happen.

15. Types of Abuse.

If a child is removed as a result of abuse, the abuse must have been quite severe.

1. Physical Abuse. Justification for removal of a child from the parental home involves more than mere spankings; the spankings probably left bruises. The CPS worker must have felt that the situation could not be resolved by keeping the child in the family home and monitoring the situation. So, the abuse was likely to have been habitual, excessive, and likely to re-occur. There is a category of "psychological abuse" but it is rarely used as justification of removal. Yelling, belittling, and threatening are examples of psychological abuse.

2. Sexual Abuse. While the majority of children sexually abused are females, there is an increasing realization that boys are being sexually abused also. Sometimes it is difficult to prove sexual abuse when the child is very young or the child is uncooperative. However, this is not the problem of foster parents. They are not investigators or expected to prove a case. They are expected to monitor the child and report any unusual behaviors.

3. Neglect. Clearly, neglect comes in all sizes and forms. In order for a child to be removed from the parental home, the neglect must be extreme and endangering the child's welfare.

4. Drug Exposed. We receive a few young children as a result of parental drug abuse during pregnancy.

16. Criminal activity by the child.

1. Drug/Alcohol Abuse. Drug and alcohol abuse are typical problems of delinquent teenagers referred to EA by probation. The substance abuse may range from light experimental to habitual. Whatever information we have about the child's history will be given to foster parents.

2. Gang Behavior. We accept relatively few children into foster care who have had extensive gang related affiliation. Foster parents and even our group homes are not equipped to deal with serious gang members. We do take "wanna be" gang members and fringe members. In this case, we feel strongly that everything should be done to distance the child from gang involvement. This includes not wearing gang "colors" or certain clothes signifying membership. Foster parents must be watchful for these signals and understand that the clothes and trinkets signaling membership change from time to time. If the child wears one set of clothes out the door and changes to another set at school, be suspicious. Foster parents have the right to prevent children from wearing certain clothes. Any clothes confiscated as being unacceptable must be turned over to CPS or probation. Foster parents have the authority to determine which clothes the child may wear and may search clothing or possessions at any time. If you contemplate a search, it is a good idea to check with your EA social worker about this before it is done. It is usually better if someone else does the search or "orders" the search. We want foster parents to be parents, not law enforcement personnel.

3. Violations of the law. Criminal activity by the child must be reported. We prefer to be notified prior to law enforcement whenever possible. Usually we can direct the notification to the proper person. Additionally, we must report all unusual incidents to Community Care Licensing, including those described below.

4. Self-Mutilation/Suicide (attempt). As with any unusual behavior, a child engaging in these hurtful behaviors requires an immediate response. EA and the child's authorized representative need to know the situation and formulate plans on what to do about it. Trained professionals will usually be consulted about the seriousness and treatment plan.

5. Out-of-Control. There are times when the child may be momentarily out of control. This behavior can usually be managed, with the foster parent consulting the EA social worker about different methods of defusing the situation. However, when the child remains out of control and presents a danger to himself/herself or to others, an EA social worker must be notified promptly. Sometimes the behavior is so serious that the first phone call should be made to the sheriff. Foster parents must use their best judgment.

On rare situations when the child is doing harm to himself/herself or is damaging your property you may restrain the child. The procedure is discussed later in the section on Discipline/Restraint.

1. Run-aways. Essentially, this is similar to a child being out-of-control. Call an EA social worker promptly. You should make an effort to locate the child, especially for younger children. You may take whatever action is necessary to prevent harm to the child or others, but your actions must not be excessive and should stop whenever the danger is over. An example of harm is when a six year old is walking down the middle of the street. But mere protection, such as stopping a 16 year old from running into the woods, is not sufficient justification for you to use force.

2. Truant. The family should be prepared for instances of truancy. A plan of action, involving a consequence should be ready. Discuss the plan with an EA social worker.

3. Unacceptable behavior. This includes a whole shoe box of behavior that is not civilized and tolerable under normal conditions. Foster parents should have various consequences and rules to deal with unacceptable behavior. The standard for unacceptable is whatever the family decides is not acceptable. This may vary from family to family, but will generally be similar.

17. Behaviors to Expect.

Most children we receive seem relatively "normal"; others have a variety of psychological, developmental, educational, and physical problems that are readily apparent.

1. Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD). Some cynics might say that the nature of children is to be non-attentive. But some children, because of some unknown biological, chemical, or genetic reason, are much more inattentive than others. Some of the children are unable to be "normally" attentive, no matter how hard they try. Such children have an attention deficit disorder (ADD). It's difficult for the average foster parent to know the difference between an ADD child and a precocious or normally active child. Foster parents should seek help from an EA social worker to assist in determining if the child has a genuine attention deficit. Some children who have attention deficits have an additional handicap, hyperactivity. This refers to behavior that is beyond the normal level of activity. Again, the cause is a still unknown biological, chemical, or genetic problem. Some forms of ADD and ADHD are treatable with prescription medications such as Ritalin or Cylert. If you have questions about this problem or medications, consult an EA social worker. EA has several video tapes about ADD and ADHD available for viewing by foster parents and agencies.

2. Antisocial - Stealing, lying, defiance. Most children referred to foster family agencies have at least one of these problems. They do not trust adults and usually have excellent reasons not to trust authority figures. Consequently, trying to emphasize the idea of trust early in placement is not a good idea. The process of teaching trust begins with having the child trust that you will do what you say. The child learns to trust your actions, then will imitate your consistency. Setting up situations which test the child's trustworthiness and honesty is a prescription for failure. Assume these qualities are skills which need to be developed over several years.

3. Sexual Acting Out.

1. Molestation. Many of our children have been molested. Statistics show that molested children are more likely to molest others and act promiscuously. Signs of molest in very young children include touching self in sexual places, inserting objects in anal and vaginal orifices, engaging in sex play with others, bullying, extreme shyness, and fear of strangers. The presence of some of these signs does not automatically confirm molest. Discuss any of these or other unusual behaviors with a social worker. Older children may develop preoccupations with sex, promiscuity, and using objects for sexual gratification.

Generally we need to stop the unacceptable behavior, without making the situation excessively punishing. The more punishment and disapproval shown, the more likely the child will withdraw and continue the practice in increasingly worse ways. One of the best plans to curtail unacceptable sexual behavior is to have repeated open discussions about it.

2. Mutual Consent. Many of our teenagers are sexually active. EA is not in favor of permitting sex between teenagers. On the other hand, we do not want foster parents to be jailers. This will be a matter to discuss with an EA social worker if it becomes a problem.

3. Pregnancy. A pregnancy during foster care is unacceptable. If there is a risk of pregnancy, the alternatives are for the teen to voluntarily use birth control or for the foster parent to insure that the teenager is continuously monitored. Foster parents can require teens to take birth control pills in front of them as proof of protection. A child may refuse, in which case continuous supervision and monitoring is required. Monitoring is difficult when the chid goes to school. If this is a problem, discuss the matter with your social worker.

EA accepts already pregnant teens and teen mothers. Foster parents are free to take or reject those arrangements, including having the infant and teen mother together.

4. Sexually transmitted disease. A medical evaluation should occur within the first month of placement. Screening should be done by the physician for sexually transmitted diseases and treatment provided. All ordinary procedures shall be followed, including compliance with public health on contagious diseases.

AIDS is a special and confusing case. EA policy is to inform foster parents promptly if we know that a child is HIV+ or has AIDS. Unfortunately, there may be times when neither EA nor the referring agency will know about it. We believe these occasions are rare. We have had very few children with the disease. If a child is suspected of having the disease, tests can be ordered. Tests require county approval and possibly a court order. While it is likely that we will be informed of the results, because of peculiar laws, we may not be. So far, that bizarre situation has not occurred. Foster parent wishes will be observed as it relates to this disease.

5. Homosexuality. While a small number of our children are homosexual, it is not unusual for children to sometimes engage in homosexual behavior of varying degrees. A surprising number of "normal" children have had homosexual contacts of one kind or another. If this situation occurs it is best to discuss the alternatives with an EA social worker. Usually the referring county will be involved in adopting plans relating to homosexual behavior with their wards or dependent children.

4. Difficulties in school - learning and behavior. Many of our children have special education needs. If such a problem is suspected, schools are responsible for conducting an evaluation when notified by foster parents or EA. This process is lengthy and includes educational testing. The results are presented by a team of school professionals to us with a determination as to whether or not the child is eligible for special education assistance. If that is the case, an Individualized Education Plan (I.E.P.) is adopted. EA social workers are expected to accompanying foster parents to IEP meetings.

Many of our children have behavioral problems requiring school discipline. Generally, foster parents should treat these situations as they would if they were the actual parent. There are times when an EA social worker should be involved in the process.

Foster parents may disclose confidential information about the child to school authorities if it is in the best interest of the child. However, most information should be withheld as it does not affect the school or education of the child. It's at our option whether or not to disclose the information. We have found most school personnel sympathetic to our children when they know the child's background.

Occasionally schools will believe a child's story, without checking the facts with foster parents, or will champion the child's cause. At such times, expect the school to contact EA or the county agency. Don't be overly upset at what may appear to be an "end run" around your authority. We expect foster parents to meet and maintain a dialogue with teachers. That often reduces conflict and insures our children receive good care.

5. Problems with peers. Foster parents can accept or reject the child's choice of friends. EA does not want our children keeping company with other children who are a bad influence. Always screen prospective friends to insure yourself that the situation is acceptable. Never permit your foster child to visit another home, without being sure an acceptable adult is supervising the situation. Don't take the child's word that an adult is present. Talk directly with the adult to verify all arrangements. It is not merely a good idea to "check up" on your foster child, it is required and a necessity. A county may require a change of placement if the child were to visit an unsupervised home and the foster parent took the child's word that supervision was present.

18. Discipline/Restraint.

1. Discipline vs. Punishment.

Personal Rights. A list of child's rights are written and provided to the child. Foster parents should read and follow the practices proscribed by law. For example, never prevent children from calling law enforcement or their county case worker. They can also call their parents, except when the county worker orders otherwise. Foster parents are expected to pay for some phone calls, but are not obligated to pay for all long distance calls.

Make sure you monitor your phone calls. Occasionally foster children have run up a sizable phone bill for which the foster parent was entirely responsible. If a call's charge is being reversed, watch that it is being done; then leave the child to privacy.

2. No Withholding Family Visits. Generally, a schedule of natural parent visits will be set by the county worker. EA policy is to avoid having those visits occur in the foster parent's home. If this is a problem, talk with an EA social worker. Foster parents are obligated to facilitate home visits, including usually taking the child to the exchange site.

Never criticize the child's natural parents to the child. This practice can result in a natural parent requesting a change of placement, and getting it granted. Feel free to criticize natural parents with your EA social worker. But remember, most times, children go home to the family. Your job is to help children make the transition and promote reunification efforts.

3. Anger/Assaultive Behavior. Helping a child to express anger is useful, but allowing a child to spew anger in unacceptable ways is not tolerable. Provide consequences, including being sent to the bedroom if ugly anger cannot be stopped immediately. You may stop a child from hitting you, but you are not permitted to strike back.

4. Sexual Issues. Never leave a female child with a male babysitter other than the foster father. Foster parents should be aware that many of our children have been taught to relate to adults sexually. It may be difficult for children to adjust to receiving attention and affection, but not sex. Foster fathers need to be particularly careful in their contact with girls. Fathers may want to reserve attention giving, affection, and hugs to when foster mothers are present.

5. Positive Statements/Reinforcement. Generally the children we receive have experienced considerable punishment, correction, and discipline. What they are lacking is praise, reward, and recognition. The single most important factor in the foster parenting process is to establish a bond with the child. This is easier if you concentrate on praising and rewarding the child. It is difficult to imagine giving the child too much praise and recognition. You need to make up for a whole history of neglect and abuse. Use non-sexual physical contact freely, as well as surprise rewards. Create an atmosphere of the child anticipating positive events occurring. It's not the dollar value of the gift or treat, but the frequency and consistency that establishes the pattern. Even in the middle of punishment, it is not difficult to remind the child how well he/she does at something.

6. Rewards. Whatever objects you give the child as a reward becomes the child's property. It is a good idea to make rewards smaller, so that they can be given out more frequently. If you make the task too complex or advanced before a reward is earned, the child will most likely fail. These children are not in the habit of striving for success; they understand repeated failures. Many of them have a history of striving for success, only to receive rejection as a reward. So the stick-with-it pattern must be developed in small steps.

7. Make consequence fit the offense. It is best to make the consequences immediate and as mild as will accomplish the task. Rely on repetition rather than intensity to do the teaching. Generally, when placing a consequence upon a behavior, make it as relevant to the misdeed as possible. For instance, if a child was 15 minutes late arriving home, make them come home 15 (or 30) minutes earlier the next time. If a child spent the night at a friend's house and "got in trouble" while there, forbid them from spending the night at that friends house again. The closer the child can relate the consequence to the misdeed, the easier it will be for them to learn by it.

8. Restrictions/Time Outs. Being sent to the child's room or in a corner may be acceptable, as long as the duration is reasonable. Exclusions of longer than a half hour for the first offense, or two hours for subsequent offenses are usually too long. Many children are ready to be good after 10-15 minutes of exclusion. It is better to give six 10-minute exclusions than a one hour exclusion. Even during exclusions, a child may contact law enforcement or the county worker. Avoid pushing the child to their room or physically baring the door to their room. This is seen as unacceptable by CCL, unless the child is actually hurting themselves or others.

9. Restraints. Physically restricting a child is called a "restraint" by the State. The definition is quite broad and includes such things as blocking a child's path, pushing a child into a bedroom for punishment, and holding a child's hand so they listen to a lecture when the child is trying to walk away. Regulations only allow restraints to be used under very restricted circumstances. The permitted situations are when a child is hurting themselves, others or doing property damage. Restraints cannot be used when there is only the suspicion that harm or damage could occur. It must be reserved for when there is good cause to believe that without restraint, the child will immediately do harm or damage.

Application of restraints is strictly governed and includes only the application of the least restrictive measure to stop the harm or damage from occurring. The restraint must also be stopped immediately when the danger has passed.

Clearly, the issue involve parental judgment. We urge parents to avoid, whenever possible, use of restraints. If nothing else, it saves on paperwork.

In general, the State believes that if the only way a foster parent can maintain control is periodic use of restraints, that child is inappropriately placed. The child should be placed in a higher level of care. There are some exceptions, but they must be discussed with all parties and approved in advance by Community Care Licensing.

10. Unacceptable Punishment. Many forms of punishment are acceptable. But some forms of punishment even good natural parents use, are unacceptable under foster care regulations. The State is willing to make the error of eliminating certain types of punishment, even though effective, rather than have a few foster parents abuse the method. For example, spankings are not allowed. A very small number of foster parents went too far with spankings. So, no foster family can spank. Perhaps that is unfortunate, but there are many other usable types of discipline available. Most of our children are accustomed to overly harsh punishment. Relying on harsh physical measures may not be the best way to rescue these children. Maybe we should try to be as different as possible from the harsh natural parents these children were removed from, even if that means abandoning some discipline methods that you may have successfully used with your own natural children.

Examples of unacceptable discipline include: prolonged periods of isolation; standing too long facing a corner; bending over and holding one's ankles; shaking the child; forcing the child to stay in one place for prolonged periods of time; a single swat on the bottom; making the child wear certain clothes designed as a punishment; ridicule; name calling; criticizing the child's family; and doing excessive work.

If you're in doubt about a form of discipline, don't use it until you discuss it with your social worker. We say this because if you do something the State believes is unacceptable, we are required to submit a formal "Incident Report" to the State about the situation. We don't want to report our foster parents and you don't want a negative report filed on you. None of us likes black marks against us, even if it's relatively mild.

We believe that punishment for foster children should be used only to change future behavior. Generally, our children have received an overdose of punishment. What they need is positives, not more negatives. Sure they need correction, but less harshly than they already received from their natural parents. We strongly believe a child will progress, less because of your discipline, but more because of your love, commitment, and praise. We want you to have firm rules and high standards, yet without a positive emotional bond, foster children will view your home as a jail. Remember, foster children are not like your own children; they don't start off with an underlying love for you. It's the love and devotion that allows your rules and discipline to work, not the punishment by itself. If punishment worked by itself, no one would return to jail or prison. We want you to focus more on building the bond between you, than being a disciplinarian.

11. What to do when nothing else works. There will be times, hopefully not often, when you have tried all the above (and then some) and the child is still out of control or the situation is only deteriorating further. It is at these times when calling your EA social worker or another foster parent can help tremendously. Often, brainstorming about ideas or just having another adult to talk to will give you a new perspective.

While we don't want foster parents to give up prematurely, we do want to be sensitive to the need for a placement change. Sometimes we're not successful, no matter what we do. Fortunately, EA's experience is that foster parents often make incredible changes in children.

19. Foster Family Rules.

1. Equal treatment or children. It is difficult for you to treat foster children exactly as you would treat natural children. However, if you go on a vacation, taking only your natural children, this gives foster children a powerful message. We don't expect treatment to be exactly equal, but close.

2. Limitations of regulations. Some practices may be okay with your own kids, but are unallowed with foster kids. Examples of differences given earlier include: spanking and leaving children home unattended. Despite the few differences, generally the rules and practices we expect you to maintain are the same as for your natural children.

3. Know your rules ahead of time. You may want to write and post house rules and chores. Foster children, like all children, try to use the excuse of forgetting as a valid excuse for neglect. Limit the excuses of forgetting or "I didn't know" by making rules and chores clear and consistent.

4. Choose your battles carefully; don't try to fix it all at once. Foster children usually have multiple problems and deficiencies. Don't try to tackle too many of the problems at once; that's a plan for failure. Prioritize the goals, tackling the most easy to change behaviors first. Don't try to attack the major issues first; they are typically the most difficult to change. Besides, it is best to start a chain of successes rather than start with a high stakes challenge. If you have to take a stand, which you probably will some time or other, take it on a small, easily defensible matter, such as washing the dishes or hanging up clothes. Avoid having the first battle be over a boyfriend, girlfriend, or school grades.

5. How to make rules. Rules should be clear, concise, and usually written. You should easily and comfortably be able to check on compliance every time. Make the rule so it can be done at least five days a week, but preferably seven. Avoid chore sharing or rotation as it complicates the process. Make the chore something for the family, rather than keeping the child's room clean. Never remind the child in advance or give warnings during the process. Establish in advance a consequence that you can follow through with every time. If you are consistent, the child will learn to trust; if you offer spotty enforcement, the child will distrust you and test out the rules more.

20. Life in a Fishbowl; Loss of Privacy.

There is no question that being a foster parent involves some loss of privacy. Your home become a "facility" open to EA and licensing inspection at any time. You are expected to set standards at least at, but usually above, the community norm. Some people may think you are reaping big dollars at the expense of innocent children and may gossip behind your back. Professionals will critically scrutinize the care you provide and the judgements you make. Sometimes people who should be thanking you for caring for children, are suspicious of your motives and distrust your observations. And perhaps as you attend training sessions, you will learn of new "terrors" inflicted upon foster parents.

Having described those horrors, EA recognizes that foster parents are the most important ingredient in residential care. If a child gets better, it's not by magic, it's by the care and devotion of foster parents. However, other agencies view children as a pie, where foster parents are only one slice of the whole. Legally that is true. Foster parents are entitled to voice their opinion, but their opinion may not be followed.

Eventually EA hopes people will abandon the pie analogy and see the matter our way. That is, as a multi-stranded necklace, with the child being the pendant gemstone at the bottom. The foster parent is the central ring or link, between the strands and the precious stone. Each strand of the necklace adds to the support, richness, and beauty of the whole. But all strands are joined at the foster parent link. Foster parents make the final and most important connection with children. Each strand needs to help in the process rather than trying to attach directly to the child. Besides merely being a pretty analogy, we believe our view is more consistent with the good social work practices and practical application of Systems Theory as taught in most university social work training centers.

21. Confidentiality.

Unlike adults, children, except under certain special circumstances, do not have a right to confidentiality. That means anything a child tells you must be released to the child's authorized representative and EA if asked. Typically, counties, courts, and EA are not concerned with little confidences, but will be if the issue is important to the case. In the same manner, you are entitled to all confidential information relevant to the child.

When releasing confidential information to EA, the county, or law enforcement, make sure you know the person's identify. If you don't already know the county worker, request their ID or making a phone call to confirm their identity.

You may, but are not required to, release confidential, sensitive information to schools and physicians. You may release information to those people if it is in the child's best interest, but be selective. If in doubt, consult an EA social worker. You may not release information to the natural parents, unless directed to by EA or the county. You must not release sensitive information to neighbors and friends about the child and child's family. Those people may know the child is a foster child, but should not know, for example, that the child was molested by the natural father. We have experienced rare situations where a neighbor was told too much information and subsequently disclosed the information inappropriately. Unfortunately, CPS agencies sometimes focus on those rare instances and want to withhold relevant information to foster families.

22. Burnout.

The capacity for doing foster care varies widely. Some people have been foster parents for decades, making it a way of life. Other people have their fill in short order. EA wants to promote foster care and tries to keep foster parents fit. We do this by being available to you 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. Fortunately, few foster parents call us on the 24th hour of the 7th day. We hope our weekly home visits serve to prevent emergencies. Part of the visit is to help you deal with the child, but another part is to provide someone to talk with about the demands of foster parenthood. Most foster parents enjoy having someone to talk to about the child, even if sometimes it is only voicing frustrations.

Sometimes situations become so difficult that a brief respite from each other is needed. On these rare occasions, other foster parents have been good about offering respite care when asked by EA social workers. The foster parent providing respite is reimbursed the days of care with the foster child by the foster parent of the foster child. The reimbursement is calculated according to the monthly reimbursement. Your EA social worker can assist in this calculation. Often, foster parents will make their own arrangements between themselves, just be sure an EA social worker is notified and the financial end of things is agreed upon.

One of the best ways to prevent burnout is to have realistic expectations for the child and for yourself. Although we want the best for children, sometimes they cannot meet a certain standard of performance. Other times, they are mysteriously attracted to failure. The fact is, foster parents can't make everything better, no matter how hard they try. Sometimes children or the court make bad decisions. Sometimes it seems that all the good work you put in goes up in smoke and you're not even left with gratitude.

If foster parents have realistic expectations, they are more likely to withstand the rough times. They are important advocates for the child. The good work they do does not vanish, but may submerge below the surface for some time. It always remains available to the child. Often we have children return as adults with heart warming stories of their foster care experiences and the lessons learned. What prevents burnout is the belief that what you do matters, and it really does matter. It matters regardless of what the court does or what people say. If you have done a good job, that part remains forever available, ready to nourish the child's future.

23. Working with EA social workers.

Social workers should assume the role of consultant and helper to you, more than supervisor or evaluator. Understandably, social workers may take on a more authoritarian role, but hopefully only briefly and rarely. They have an obligation to make sure that your house and child care practices meet licensing and EA standards. Beyond that, there is considerable room for individuality and family variation.

There is a tendency for foster parents to sometimes treat EA social workers as though they are outsiders, critical and expecting perfection. That leads to omissions and cover ups. Our experience is that foster parents (and even EA social workers) make mistakes. Most people in human services are willing to forgive small errors, particularly as long as the mistake is promptly shared and corrected. People are not inclined to forgive deception or dishonesty.

Our job is to help you rectify any situation so it doesn't grow into something beyond our control. Treat EA social workers as being part of your team, your extended family. We have a major stake in your success. We want you to look good, because that's what makes EA look good. So, don't feel alone, we are there to help you in your successes and failures.

24. EA Training Policy.

Current law requires all certified foster family homes to complete at least 12 hours of training prior to annual recertification. In a dual-parent home, this means a combined total of 12 hours, in any combination, between foster mother and foster father. For a single parent home, all 12 hours must be obtained by the one foster parent.

Within 6 months of initial certification, at least one hour of training must be dedicated to Child Abuse Reporting Laws. Acceptable training to meet the required hours can be from EA sponsored training or training sponsored by other agencies, such as Child Abuse Prevention Councils, Child Care Resource and Referral, Probation or Social Services Departments, local PTAs, Red Cross, local hospitals, and local Community Colleges. The first aid, CPR, and water safety courses all apply to yearly training hours. EA staff will alert foster homes to local training courses whenever possible.

A portion of the mandatory 12 hours/year can be obtained through self-study with appropriate follow-up by a social worker. For example, an approved video may be viewed in the foster home with a written test administered and reviewed by an EA social worker. Finally, a discussion of key topics would complete the training. Thus, watching a one hour approved video, along with write-up and Social Worker review, would equal 11/2 hours of training. Similarly, an approved book could be read, a report written and reviewed by a social worker, then a follow-up discussion once again. For books, 200 pages will be considered one hour.

At the expiration of the certificate, if the home does not have the necessary training hours, the reimbursement rate will be reduced by $200 per month, per child placed in the home, until such time as the home is current on training hours. This policy also applies should the home not fulfill other certification requirements such as updated DMV, current driver's license, and home-inspection deficiencies at the time of re-certification. As soon as the home is current, withheld money will be returned to the certified foster home. No new children will be placed in the home unless the family is meeting the training standards. If a foster home is still deficient at the end of a second year, the home will be de-certified and the children will be removed. At that point, withheld money will not be returned.

It is the intent of this agency to make training as convenient as possible. Ultimately, however, EA will have no alternative but to comply with State law.

If there are any questions regarding this training policy, please contact any of EA's directors: Tim Wilkinson (916)343-1100, Jim Hardee (916)283-3330 or Roddy Mac (916)281-6666.


Part I
| Part II | Training Verification of Foster Parent Manual